Postpartum

With my first birth I struggled with post-partum depression, but I did not realize I struggled with that until I was going through the post-partum phase this go around. I felt completely different in a good way!

This time I was smiling, laughing, filled with joy and just overall so happy. I can think of a couple reasons that probably played a hand in keeping my spirits up this time.

First, I had a toddler. Yes, I was home taking care of my newborns, but I was not alone. I had my first born with me that I had to play with, cuddle, and take care of. He made me get out of bed and keep doing everyday tasks because I had to, in order to take care of him. If you read my last post-partum journey you know that I would wake up, feed baby and basically just do everything in my room because it was just my newborn and I for most of the day. This time around I was chasing a toddler!

Second, I also got to witness my toddler grow and develop in such an important stage in his life while I was home on maternity leave. My toddler was 16-19 months old during my maternity leave. He had just started walking at 14 months so towards the beginning of my leave he was still getting used to moving. He then was getting so many teeth! He started my maternity leave with only 3 teeth and when my leave ended, he had 9. Kaison was also learning words and being more interactive. We would have dance parties and color together. It was just such a heartwarming experience to see him grow and I knew I would miss this time once I had to go back to work, so I didn’t want to miss a second of it when I was on maternity leave.

Finally, I let people help me. My mom took off work during the afternoons three days a week for two weeks to help me with the transition of 1 to 3 kids. This gave me time to take a shower, do chores, and/or just have someone to talk to instead of talking to someone who can’t talk back for 8+ hours a day.

I also had my husband’s family come in from out of town. They did this with my first born as well but the timing was just perfect this time around and we actually had a room set up for them this time rather than them just having to sleep in the living room – so I felt like I had space to pump and be myself at nighttime.

Since this was my second post-partum experience, maybe I was also just used to some of the things that I went through, so I didn’t have to worry as much as I did the first go around. Either way, my experience was so positive this time compared to my first. It was like night and day for comparison.

My advice to anyone going through the post-partum phase is to set daily affirmations, remember to give yourself grace, be present in the moment, and to remember the scene in Tarzan when the momma gorilla holds her hands up and baby Tarzan places his hand in hers. Your babies are not going to be this little forever…soak up this time with them and let your heart fall in love all over again.